Hello Sports Fans, it's ya boy Washington TC here about to drop some knowledge. Remember me? Well I'm back, in blog form.
Now I have only one specific topic for this blog here, but I will lead into that topic with a few other little subjects just to keep you interested, because I'm just that kind of guy.
So last night I was bored out of my mind right, so I decided to read a bit of my new book I got for Christmas, Decoded. Which by the way is extremely awesome, so yeah probably go out and purchase that one. For those of you who are uneducated on Decoded, it is Jay Z's book. Anyway after reading that for a while I was in a pretty gangster mood, so I decided I would watch Notorious and write a rap. Because I got to be representing The Kliq, you know how it is. Well sadly enough I couldnt find my copy of Notorious so I had to revert to 8 Mile. Which bring me to my main topic, but points to take out of this paragraph: 1. Buy Decoded
2. Always have Notorious accesible
So I'm watching 8 Mile, it's doing its thing, being pretty awesome. It comes up to the final scene, the battles. In my head Eminem straight up destroys everyone in these. Now I haven't watched it in a while and maybe I forgot this, but I would like to call shenanigans. First round, Rabbit V Lickety Split. I think Lickety Split wins! Yeah I said it, and I will show you why. I can't seem to post a link to the YouTube video so I'll just hit ya with some lyrics and you can find it on the Tube if you wish.
(Lickety Split)
This guy's a choke artist
You catch a bad one
Your better off shooting yourself
With Papa Doc's handgun
Climbing up this mountain your weak
I'll leave you lost without a paddle
Floatin shits creek
You ain't Detroit, I'm the D
Your the new kid on the block
Bout to get smacked back to the boonedocks
Fuckin Nazi, this crowd ain't your type
Take some real advice, and form a group with Vanilla Ice
And what I tell you, you better use it
This guy's a hillbilly this ain't Willy Nelson music
Trailor trash, I'll choke you til your last breath
And have you lookin foolish
Like Cheddar Bob when he shot himself
Silly Rabbit, I know why they call you that
Coz you follow Future like he got carrots up his asscrack
And when you actin up, that's when you got jacked up
And left stupid like Tina Turner when she got smacked up
I'll crack your shoulder blade
You'll get dropped so hard
Elvis will start turning in his grave
I don't know why they let you out in the dark
You need to take your white ass back across 8 mile
To the trailer park
(Rabbit)
This guy raps like his parents jerked him
He sounds like Eric Sermon, The generic version
This whole crowd looks suspicious
It's all dudes in here, except for these bitches
So I'm a German, eh
That's ok, you look like a fucking worm with braids
These leaders of the Free World rookies
Lookie, how can 6 dicks be pussies
Talking bout shits creek
Bitch, you could be up piss creek
With paddles this deep
Your still gonna sink
Your a disgrace
Yeah, they call me Rabbit
This is a turtle race
He can't get with me spittin this shit
Wickedly lickety shot
Spickety spickety split lickety
So Im gonna turn around with a great smile
And walk my white ass back across 8 Mile
Alright so you should be able to just see that and think Eminem loses but I guess I will go through why aswell. My first argument would have to be "Wickedly lickety shot, Spickety spickety split lickety", yeah well that just makes no sense to me, and that seems to be one of his big punchlines. Umm the "worm with braids" line, um, well, it's just not very good, is he saying he looks like a worm? Is that payout? In response to being called a Nazi? Especially when that Nazi line pwns! Then that whole middle bit of the freestyle, about piss creek, pretty average, while the shits creek line is not that good, I feel like he made a lame joke lamer. And the turtle race, that is just like something you would hear in christian rap. It's very PG.
He has 2 good lines in my opinion. The dicks be pussies line. And the closing line.
Now in "Lickety's" verse I believe there is more than 2 good lines. At this stage I would also like to remind you that this is the first battle against "Rabbit", so all the choking lines, trailer trash lines, white lines, being beat up lines and Cheddar Bob lines are all fresh, and therefore all good. So I think the "Nazi" line is good, obviously. Then the Vanilla Ice line is ok. The line about Cheddar Bob is also ok. The line about him following Future, that's just good. Then the next bit about how they beat him up and left him "like Tina Turner when she got smacked up", yeah that is good too. Then he tells him to get fucked at the end with an ok line.
Now I am not saying that "Lickety Split" murders him or anything. But Future gives it to "Rabbit" unanimously. It was definetly closer than that with "Lickety Split" having the edge I feel. So yeah, I know everyone loves 8 Mile, myself included, but his next 2 awesome freestyles don't count in my head anymore, and neither should they in yours.
Thanks for reading peeps. I will see you soon, or I will see you on another time.
Peace and Love.
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